Wednesday 23 December 2009

Almost there....

and still not quiet.
The year is gone.
I know it will be a next couple of very quiet days, at least here in the UK everything closes down for the holiday...and, though in one way I m feeling great and more than acomplished, on the other hand, there is a girl coming visit from Norway and the place is not ready to receive visitors...
I know everyone says it doesn't matter, but in the very core, it matters to me.
And here is where I feel my limitations, my disability.
On top of things this morning, don't know exactly why, maybe because I was distracted thinking I need to call my cousins in Argentina, I took 2 Tramadols too many.
I was sick for a bit, feeling better now, but still not wanting to get out of bed.
I feel that guilt of dirty, untidy house and the need for a shower, still I have no energy to get up.
What I want is to get rid of the guilt.
I know if I saw someone posting the same thing I would say sod the world, no guilt.
It isnt quiet the same with one's own life.
I'm just waiting for some photos to download.
I should probably be saying Merry Xmas and all that, but honestly, it doesn't feel like that now.
May come back later, probably, yup.

3 comments:

Roban said...

You know, Cynthia, it really doesn't matter about the house.... Your friend is coming to see YOU, not how clean your house is! YOU!

In the past, I could wait until the night before a party to clean my house from top to bottom. I still wait like that, but I've realized recently that I can't get it all done like I used to.

Hugs and blessings.... I hope you feel better soon.

miruspeg said...

I agree with you Cynthia, it is so easy to give advice and encouragement but we have to live with our own guilt and limitations and sometimes they suck!!!

I hope you accomplish to your satisfaction all you need to achieve before your vistor arrives....where there is a will there is a way.

Really looking forward to seeing you again in 2010 on my way home from the USA and I hope the house is tidy.....LOL.

Big hugs
Peggy xxx

McMGrad89 said...

Well, my house is rarely tidy and I usually find myself running around like a maniac to get it ready for people. There are only two people I never worried about one of them was my dad. I knew they would still love me - mess and all.

We love you regardless, but get up and take a shower...As my husband always told me and I always balked at...It will make you feel better. When I finally conceded, he was always right. (I hate that.)

Hugs
Annemarie